tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-62787555924493903152024-03-13T10:53:06.752-07:00*brat inna box*Previously known as 'Daddy holds my hand'. Away for a long period, but back and starting fresh! babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-56874641809671007912014-05-27T09:13:00.001-07:002014-05-27T09:13:50.121-07:00Oral gone OMG! x_x Despite what you read, or see in porn. Sex isn't always as clean, or smooth as we would like it to be. I am sure all of us have had those,<i><b> EEE,AHHH, OMG</b></i> moments during sex. Here is one from this pup...that my Daddy/Dom found very, laugh out loud amusing.. me? Well, not so much. Not at the time, anyway! <br />
<br />
After some very intense and amazing play I had been granted permission to finish him orally,
which I absolutely love doing. There is a combination of things I do
that make him crazy and give him some of his more intense orgasms.<br />
<br />
So here I am, shaking and trembling from the already mind blowing
orgasms that have been given.. and he orders me to not take my mouth off
of him as I work him up with my hands and mouth (with yummy bubble gum
lube!) His hands still caressing and working over my very sensitive
areas, ordering me to cum and cum... that I am so excited and turned on,
and sucking good and hard.<br />
<br />
Now, a little thing I do when he is having
his orgasm, is add more suction right as he starts to ejaculate. He says
this makes the orgasm way more powerful and intense for him. I've
always been able to do this well... but this time, I don't know if I was
because I kept having orgasms during, or just got a little to...
suction like excited.. but I actually sucked so hard that his sperm,
instead of it all just rushing down my throat some of it, came.. out..
of.. my.... nose!<br />
<br />
I realized what was happening as I saw a drop land back on him and
felt like my nose was suddenly running! I tried to keep my shock and
utter.. omg moment to myself long enough to make sure his bed grabbing,
growl grunting intense moment was easing down.. but then sat up... and
he caught on to what just happened. This ended in him laughing his butt
off, and me sputtering and running to blow my nose and get a drink,
while trying not to crack up myself.<br />
<br />
I guess I see the logic of how it happened, but .. seriously?! lol!babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-21838873796177228222014-05-18T13:46:00.001-07:002014-05-18T13:46:47.394-07:005 Lessons Learned:*Another old, but favorite post.. I really need to make an updated list!*<br />
<br />
When over Daddy's knee getting punished, do not casually try to stick
lucky charms in Daddy's uniform pockets. (Daddy and I had been snacking
on dry lucky charms before hand) Daddy will notice, and Daddy will give
you extra swats for this!<br />
<br />
Hiding Daddy's belt or other tools only leads to even more trouble.<br />
<br />
Don't get ideas from threads on fetlife that other slaves/baby
girls/subs have tried to get away with... furthermore, don't laugh your
butt off while reading said threads when Daddy is near by. This results
in knowing the next time you get a long session of spanking, a picture
of the end results will be taken and posted on fetlife, and you are told
you will post a note in your profile stating that every time you get
into trouble, said photo will become your profile picture. :P (This has
yet to happen, but shhh, don't tell!)<br />
<br />
Do not try to hold Daddy's hands behind his head or top him in any
way... Daddy is strong and can lift you upside down without much effort!
:o<br />
<br />
You never know what Daddy is really thinking during punishment. Example,
Daddy says pick one.. the hairbrush or belt. You fear the back of the
hairbrush, for you've heard so many say how bad it stings. You pick the
belt. The belt gets put away... Daddy says, I didn't say what you were
picking for baby girl! (I'm sitting on a pillow today!)<br />
<br />
In living in the DaddyDom/baby girl
lifestyle 24/7 I find myself being torn with being that sweet baby girl
that will do anything to please Daddy. Or being a little, bratty to push
the boundaries and see what I can get away with. I never go into being
disrespectful areas, or things that I know will seriously make Daddy
angry, but those little things that to him,make me cute and sassy -
well, those are another thing...um, right? I know Daddy doesn't want a
doormat. But I also know Daddy doesn't want disrespect or serious rule
breaking. I think so far I've kept a pretty good balance, but I tend to
wonder - how many subs out there get that urge to be a little imp and
see what you can get away with?<br />
<br />
I know there are some that just purely like being bratty. I know many
define bratty in different ways also. Being a brat I hear is being
disrespectful or not knowing when is too much or when to stop. Being
bratty on the other hand I've heard is more like the things I've been
testing the waters with. I would never actually try to top Daddy. He is
the dominant, he always has been. I respect,love and need that...<br />
<br />
But, this baby girl has a lot of ornery streaks in her, for sure!babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-17084101722154173142014-05-18T13:41:00.004-07:002014-05-18T13:41:43.960-07:00Shower Punishment.As I enter the room, i hear the spray of the shower. Images of You
standing under the cascading waters create stirrings in my groin.
Smiling to myself, i shake my head and begin to change into my pajamas.
Yet, the more i try to ignore the sounds — and the accompanying thoughts
— the more pervasive they become.<br />
<br />
Without warning i find myself
debating in my mind — my body wants to follow the sounds; my mind is
staying stay, for i know i am supposed to do as Daddy says. And Daddy’s
orders are to change into my nightgown and be prepared and ready for
inspection.<br />
<br />
Standing outside the bathroom door; i don’t even recall crossing the
room… my hand reaches for the knob. Now there is a full-blown war
between subconscious desires and conscious caution. Part of me wants so
very much to enter — part of me is warning me to stay out. What if You
become angry at the invasion? What if You become angry at my disobedient
action? But … even as i ponder these questions i find the door slowly
swinging open… my feet betray me and i slip into the bathroom.<br />
The clouds of steam give it an surreal feeling.<br />
<br />
The moist heat
surrounds me…i gaze at your outline through the opaque glass of the
shower doors. Desire floods my body. The trembling in my body is a
combination of fear and yearning. Fear that you will be so very angry
with me — yearning for You and the rapture that You can bring forth in
me.<br />
You are still unaware of my presence….i can still flee. But, while i
decide to back out of the room while i still can, i instead find myself
sliding the shower door open… my legs feel like jello being rippled in a
bowl — i can no longer hide…i see the look of surprise on your face.
Searching Your eyes for any hint of displeasure, i stand just outside
the shower.<br />
<br />
The water now spraying me, dampening my gown. Madly i try to
think of a logical explanation for my presence!<br />
<br />
You see my feet shuffle, as i look up at You with my big green eyes.
You look amused, but still have that ‘Daddy look’ as Your eyes narrow
down at me. “Is something wrong, baby girl?” You ask, with almost a sly
tone. Biting at my lip, i can only shake my head and lower my eyes. Your
strong hand reaches out and lifts my chin… i know this means You want
me to make eye contact with You. Looking up again, i fumble to find the
words that are dashing through my head, but can only manage a small
stutter. “Speak up, and clearly now, princess… like you’ve been taught.”
You say sternly.<br />
<br />
“Yes Daddy, i.. i just wanted to, well – see You is
all.”<br />
You know there is more to it, for You know Your baby girl better than anyone.<br />
“Is baby girl disobeying by not preparing for Daddy as she was
instructed to do?” You ask, with that matter of fact tone You have
mastered so well. Feeling the butterflies in my tummy start to flap
around like crazy, i try to think of a way to justify why i am standing
before you, now with a damp gown.. and quivering legs. Failing this
attempt, i can only muster out a…”Yes Daddy…” as i lower my head again.<br />
<br />
Your arms reach out and smoothly pull me into the shower…i feel Your
hands sliding my gown off my shoulders. It slithers down my body,
dropping in a pile at my feet. You reach out for me. Your hand takes
mine. Your hand, so strong neither draws me in nor pushes me away. The
water begins to cover me. As You draw me even closer to You, i feel the
surges of emotion sweep through my body. Every nerve is now alive and
signaling. You lower Your head — Your mouth covering mine. The kiss is
gentle yet provocative. As You slide Your arms around my shoulders to
draw me even closer, my mind finds sanctuary. Your tongue now probing my
lips and my own tongue slides out to entwine and dance with yours.
Waves of desire flood my being.<br />
<br />
My small breasts press against Your wet chest, the water lubricating
our bodies so that we glide together. The swelling of Your staff presses
between my legs. Pulling Your head back enough to meet my eyes again,
You remind me that i have still disobeyed You. And while You do not ever
get angry with me for wanting to see or be with You.. when i am told to
do something, it is to be done. You tell me that while it is ok that i
need You, a baby girl must learn patience and do as she is told, when
she is told.<br />
<br />
Knowing You are right, as Daddy always is… i softly tell You i am
sorry for misbehaving. You reach out and wipe away the first fallen tear
from my eyes, and kiss my nose before turning my body around and
instruct me to get into position. Realizing that You are about to punish
me here and now, i instantly squirm, knowing that the water is going to
make it sting that much more. But, not wanting to further disobey, i
lean my body forward and brace myself against the shower wall. The water
splashes down on my bottom and i feel Your hand gently caressing the
soon to be very red flesh.<br />
<br />
You take your time, and the anticipation of what is to come rushes
through me. You’ve never actually spanked me fully in the shower, beyond
a slap here or there for fun or reminder when i tend to get carried
away when washing Daddy. Feeling my legs tremble, i start to squirm
again… causing You to grab a hold of my hips, and tell me sternly to
stay still.. or it will be much more severe. With the words “Yes
Daddy..” getting caught in my throat, i feel the first sting of Your
hand hit the right cheek. Before i can even mutter out a ‘one..’ i feel
it again on the left side. You’ve gone straight to business… right to
left… right to left… each starting to sting more than the last. Tears
start to fill my eyes, but i am also suddenly having a war in my mind
about the water… for it is making each smack sting that much more.. but
also, i have hopes that it will somewhat conceal how wet i am becoming
between my legs.<br />
<br />
Feeling Daddy pause, i stay in position.. knowing better than to move
until Daddy says so. I then feel Daddy lathering soap over the already
stinging spots… at first it feels soothing, but Oh! how the stings kick
in. Trying with all my might not to start squirming again, i feel my
knees bend forward… You take one strong arm and hold me at the hips, as
the other instantly goes back to the punishment of spanking Your little
girl’s ass.<br />
<br />
Emotions sweep through me as the quivering within becomes a sensation
of infinite pleasure.Your hands skillfully deliver each swat and with
each one, i feel more and more release. How i thrive on Your authority..
the feel of Your hands How secure i feel as You draw me even closer to
You after delivering the final swats. Feeling Your shaft press against
me, my hips begin a gentle rotation … pressing against Yours…i feel Your
Stiffness sliding along my mound … i press against it more. Your hands
run down my back … fingers gently rubbing my spine — searching for each
area; massaging; rubbing. You again take the soap and begin to
thoroughly lather my body. Working in small circles, You watch the white
bubbles cover my skin as Your hands slide across my breasts, You hear a
moan emanate from deep within me. Your fingers toy with my distended
nipples.<br />
<br />
Time loses all meaning as we move together under the warm mist of the
shower spray. Each passing second increasing the desires until it would
seem that our bodies must explode…i take the soap and work up even more
lather…i ask You for permission to lather up Your now very erect cock.<br />
The soap falls from my hands as i tilt my head back to kiss you…my
tongue probing your mouth. Finally drawing away, i bend forward to pick
up the soap … a smile toying with my lips. i enjoy the pretense of ‘just
picking up the soap’ as though i am not aware that Your staff is now
pressed against the tight opening. Using my body to signal You that i
want You to penetrate me — to press into that tight, quivering hole.
Knowing that You will move slowly inwards until the muscles relent to
the pressure of Your staff and accept the pleasures of stimulation being
offered…i derive immense pleasure from the twinge of discomfort at
first being entered there. The muscles relent at Your steady pressure
and You slide in … so very, very slowly. Your hands reaching under to
caress my breasts, massaging them…my nipples pressed between Your
fingers send shocks through my body as i press backwards against You,
wanting You fully within me.<br />
<br />
You order me to reach down to caress myself … igniting flames of
sensations that flood my being as You begin to pump. Now, the muscles
are responding to the pleasant stimulation and also sending currents of
ecstasy through my body. Mewing cries of pleasure escape my lips … You
allow the passions to erupt and thrust in harder and faster — plunging
into me i feel the warmth as Your fluids flood me. Your moans of release
filling my ears and my approaching orgasm starts to climbs to unknown
peaks. Breathlessly, i ask for permission to come for Daddy… “Please
Daddy, please can i come…” i beg… feeling Your arms tighten around me,
You tell me i will do no such thing at this moment… but i will wash up,
and go finish preparing as You originally instructed.. and we will see
about release if you behave this time….babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-54816992635134771042014-05-18T13:37:00.000-07:002014-05-18T13:37:28.262-07:00The Storm.She felt the storm flow through her body, energizing her with its
power. She had always been like this, restless, feeling the blood
rushing madly through her veins, the warm rain pelting down on her face.
He could feel the tension in her too. She practically radiated it. She
stood there, eyes closed feeling everything. It set her nerves on edge.<br />
<br />
He went to her, and placed His hands on her shoulders. She didn’t
move a muscle. Slowly, He slid His hands down her arms, moving to her
waist and pulling her to His body. She trembled slightly, her hands
curling into fists in an attempt to subdue the turmoil within her. Still
her eyes remained closed.<br />
He could feel the electricity in the air. It made Him a little crazy
too. He bent down to her ear. Very deliberately, He blew softly into it.
She gave a sharp cry and came alive, twisting around to press herself
into His body.<br />
<br />
He took her weight easily as He ran one hand through her
wet hair.<br />
Her hands clutched at His back, as her lips claimed His. This was no
warm, loving kiss. Her tongue thrust into His mouth, boldly demanding a
response. He gave it. His hand molded her body against His as He let
loose all the wildness He restrained with everyone but her.<br />
<br />
Lightning flashed above them lighting up the clearing for a split
second. She jerked against Him, hands clenching behind His back. Then
suddenly she shoved Him away and ran. He stood frozen in shock… what was
His little one up to now? Then He was after her.<br />
<br />
They ran deeper into the woods. The rain was coming down so hard that
He could barely make her out in front of Him. She was running so fast
that He was scared that she would slip on the muddy ground and slide
down one of the steep inclines. Amazingly she stayed on her feet, still
racing with the wind. Her exultant laughter floated back on the wind to
Him.<br />
<br />
Suddenly she slid to a stop, doubling over to catch her breath, laughing
breathlessly still. He pulled her upright and propped her against a
tree. Her clothes were soaked, her hair plastered against her brow but
she was more alive now than He had ever seen her. Her eyes were aglow as
she threw back her head, stretched her arms out and yelled.<br />
<br />
Her eyes came back to His face. He saw the power in her eyes, and
suddenly He had the wild notion that the storm’s energy was in her,
being channeled somehow through her to the outside. Her gaze
intensified. Her lips parted, her tongue slipped out to slide delicately
over her lower lip.<br />
“Do you want me, Daddy?” Her voice was lower and huskier than normal.<br />
“How could I not…” He answered, His eyes drinking in the sight of her
moving slowly against the tree. She held out a hand to Him.<br />
“Then take me, Daddy…”<br />
<br />
He pressed her down onto the wet grass. She let her body fall with
His, melt into the ground. Then swiftly, she twisted out from under His
body, threw a leg over Him and propped herself over Him, her face alight
with triumph. She caught His wrists and dragged them over His head,
holding them down to the ground. She knew He wasn’t using His strength,
for she could never top her Daddy, and she knew she would probably pay
dearly for her bravery… but something inside her had taken over. Slowly,
she stretched out over Him, her breasts poised over Him, erect nipples
clearly outlined through the wet fabric.<br />
<br />
“Baby girl….”<br />
“You like, Daddy?” she purred.<br />
“Like? Here’s how much I like…”<br />
He threw her off, pinned her down easily, shifting to let her feel His obvious arousal against her thigh.<br />
<br />
“Tell me. How much do you want Daddy inside of you?”<br />
She groaned in response, thrusting up her hips against Him. He laughed
softly then bent down to suck her earlobe into His mouth. She tried to
squirm away from Him.<br />
“Do you want to feel my tongue against your little clit? Do you want
to feel my fingers slide deep into you, press against your walls?” came a
low, deliciously husky voice in her ear.<br />
“Yes!” she gasped, as the vibration of His voice sent tiny muscle spasms
running down her side. A wet tongue slid around the shell of her ear.
She shrieked. Dammit, He knew perfectly well that her right ear was one
of her most sensitive spots! Then the lightning flashed again and she
was arching against Him, suddenly filled with the need for passion and
power.<br />
“Yes, what…?” He demanded.<br />
“Yes, Daddy…! Please, i need you now…” she groaned. He cocked His head in mock surprise.<br />
“Now where’s that little one who spends our nights endlessly trying
to tease Daddy? Can’t baby girl stand it when the shoe’s on the other
foot?” He bent down swiftly to sweep His tongue over the sensitive side
of her neck. She groaned as her body continued to move restlessly under
Him.<br />
<br />
“Too bad.” He continued silkily. “Daddy is going to take His time and see that baby girl goes crazy with pleasure.”<br />
Swiftly He came to His feet and reached down to pull her up. Backing
away slightly, His intense eyes holding hers, He began to strip. Her
heart leapt into her throat and stayed there as He finally stood there
in front of her. A wave of faintness swept over her as her eyes traveled
over His body.<br />
<br />
“Undress yourself… now, baby girl.” He ordered His eyes still on hers.<br />
Sobered a little by the depth of her emotions, she lifted her hands to
her buttons and began to shed her clothes, unconsciously using the grace
inherent in her. Soon she too was bare; her skin prickling in the wind
that rustled the leaves around them. He made the first step, backing her
into a tree.<br />
The feel of His firm body pressed against hers, the hardness of His
penis trapped against the soft flesh of her tummy. The knot of tension
within her tightened as her breathing shallowed.<br />
<br />
He bent His head ever
so slowly to nuzzle at her neck. A wet tongue stroked up to her ear and
then down again, tantalizing every single nerve ending on the way. Her
nails dug into His forearms as muscles in her buttocks contracted with
exquisite slowness.<br />
<br />
Thunder crashed above them and a fresh fall of rain made its way
through the leaf cover onto them. The heat of His body burned through
the chill as His hands moved over her body, touching, stroking, and
spreading the water over her breasts. Suddenly, she came to life again,
wrapping her arms around His neck and pulling His head down for an
intense, satisfying kiss. One bare leg lifted and hooked over His hip as
she pulled Him into her body.<br />
<br />
He could feel the heat of her groin pressing against His hip, more
than just tempting Him to plunge into its warm depths. But He was
enjoying Himself way too much to end it so soon. Instead, He slipped one
hand down her side, followed the smooth curve of her bottom and stroked
along her raised thigh. He broke away from their kiss, and smoothly
turned her and placed her hands against the tree. In one quick motion He
pulled a twig down off the branch above and stroked it along her
bottom. Feeling her breath deepen as she heard the twig break then
stroke her wet flesh. She had known better than to try and take some
control, she didn’t even want it. Then she felt the first sting and she
gave a sharp gasp. Sensations flooded her as she felt Him take back the
control, the power she always needed Him to have. What was she
thinking, running from Him… teasing Him… she knew better? But now, He
was making it right, correcting His little girl… and oh how she longed
for it.<br />
<br />
She gave another sharp gasp as the twig met her bottom again and again, pressing her palms against the tree.<br />
His cool fingers parted her outer lips and suddenly drove into her. He
could fell her inner muscles contracting around His fingers and He
crooked them forwards and found her G-spot. Slowly He started to stroke
the sensitive tissue, softly at first and then with more pressure.<br />
She buried her face into her arms, stifling her moans and cries. Her
nails dug into the hard bark of the tree as she held on for dear life.
Carefully, He added His thumb to the concerto, finding her throbbing
clitoris and started on the exact same rhythm He was using inside her.<br />
<br />
“Daddy, Please…”<br />
“Relax. Don’t fight It.” He murmured into her ear, as He started up again.<br />
“Oh God… please… Daddy… “<br />
He sped up the tempo. Harsh cries started to escape her, her body
tensing up against Him. She had never felt such violent pleasure in her
life. She needed to scream, to tear into Him, anything to keep her from
going insane.<br />
<br />
He managed to keep her upright as her legs gave way, concentrating on
keeping the pressure of His fingers intense all the while. His own body
was on fire, as He felt her muscles start to contract involuntarily.
Her scream came with the thunder, and then again and again as her
orgasms tore into her with a force she had never imagined.<br />
He held her then, feeling the aftershocks run through her exhausted
body long after she came. His own body was throbbing unmercifully after
watching her explosive climaxes, every fiber straining to thrust into
her with all the power He had.<br />
He looked at His baby girl, and could see the impish glint return to
her eyes as she turned to face Him. A very familiar smile spread over
her lips… Now, where was i, Daddy?babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-41421179850539250062014-05-18T13:34:00.000-07:002014-05-18T13:34:24.375-07:00Sister Fantasy.Daddy has this very skilled way of talking to me during sex or
playtime. His voice is always confident and strong. Never missing a word
or stumbling with what to say next. He always knows what to say that
will make me pant,squirm and beg for more. But, me on the other hand..
while i know i am very skillful in a lot of things in bed, this is not
my strongest area, i become so aroused that i am moaning, squirming and
trying to form a coherent sentence in my head. It doesn’t always work!
Instead… Yes Daddy, Oh pleassse Daddy, Mm, fuck me Daddy, i’ll be a good
girl Daddy.. a lot of moaning and so on comes out. This is something
that i think Daddy wants me to work on, but that is actually not going
to be the point of this post.<br />
<br />
Recently, Daddy asked me if there has been any new fantasies i have
had lately, and to share them with Him. The first fantasy that rushed
into my head, was one that has been frequent to me, especially during
assigned playtime. (Times when Daddy tells me to play, with fingers/toy
or whatever for a certain amount of time, but not cum unless I have
permission.) Telling Daddy of this fantasy lead to Daddy talking dirty
like to me, involving different scenarios of it, and asking me if baby
girl would like this, or that and so on. Just hearing Daddy sternly talk
to me in any way gets my juices flowing, but adding this fantasy in, oh
wow. Talk about turning into a quivering wet baby girl!<br />
So i got to thinking, where better to share this fantasy, but here? In my head, the fantasy goes something like this:<br />
<br />
Daddy has let me have a play date. Or perhaps a sister. Daddy is off
at work, and us girls are left home to do our chores and behave ’till
Daddy returns home. Trying to be good girls for Daddy, we do some
chores. But, naturally our impish sides come out, and we keep teasing
each other. Laughing, tickling, pillow fights.. just doing what girls
do. Perhaps we’d sneak into the ice cream. And perhaps some ice cream
would drip down onto her neck and i would not be able to resist leaning
forward to lick it off. Or maybe boredom would kick in, and we’d sneak
into my paints. Before long, the paint would be more on us, than the
canvas or paper. Of course this would mean we’d start to paint and
decorate each other. Adding some glitter, some sparkle.. ooo pretty
colors. Painting her pretty breasts in a nice purple or pink. Hands
getting very curious and paint going everywhere! We’d lose track of
time, the ice cream would be setting on the counter melting. paint all
over us, and we’d hear the door. Daddy’s voice will call into us, and
we’d scurry around, busted and dirty, and…. very wet. Daddy finds us,
and we instantly see that Daddy look cross over his face, and we’d know
right off how much trouble we are in. He’d investigate to see just how
much trouble we’ve made while He was working, and we’d be sent to our
baths to get cleaned up before punishment. Daddy would not let us play
with the toy duck, or bubbles, but to get straight in and wash, and be
waiting for Him in the correct position for when He is ready to deal
with His two little imps.<br />
<br />
Nervously we wash each other, sneaking a kiss here, and a grope
there. But quickly, for we know how much trouble we are in! Drying each
other off like good girls, and picking some nice clean undies, we hurry
into the bedroom and get into position. Waiting, and waiting the nerves
start to grow more. Once in awhile we exchange a glance and try to stay
very quiet as we know Daddy is out looking at the messes we’ve made.
When Daddy does arrive to punish us, our eyes get wide as Daddy slides
off His work belt. The noise of the quick slick motion causes us to
shiver. Daddy lectures us for disobeying His rules, and sternly asks us
who started the mess. Who left the ice cream out, and were we allowed to
sneak into the goodies?<br />
<br />
The lecture continues, and we sniffle a little.
Biting my lip, i wonder who will be first in punishment. Not much time
is granted for me to wonder my thought though, for Daddy stands in front
of me. Looking up, i whisper.. “baby girl is so sorry Daddy… we.. we….”
Hush, is all Daddy says in response before motioning me to lean over
the bed. Not wanting to make Daddy more angry i rush onto the bed… my
eyes close tightly as Daddy slides down the clean panties me and sissy
had picked for each other after bath. Then, i feel Him place her next to
me. Both of our rears exposed and upright on the bed. my heart skips a
beat as i hear Daddy begin to lecture us on being good little girls, and
how disappointed Daddy is that we decided to break His rules.
Swallowing hard, there is not even time to try to whimper another
apology before i feel the sting of Daddy’s belt hit my backside. One,
after another… but terrible of me, i forget to count. Daddy stops and
reminds me that i am not receiving punishment as I was taught. i stumble
to get it right, and count as Daddy’s belt lands on my sensitive skin
each time. Stopping Daddy turns to her and does the same. Back and forth
Daddy’s belt punishes us as we squirm and our little asses become
bright red.<br />
<br />
After, Daddy informs us to stand in the corner… hands above our head,
and we are not to move ’till Daddy says so. Our cheeks red, upper and
lower, we sniffle in the corner. More time passes and Daddy comes back
in to give us kisses and hugs, and tells us we are still good girls,
just a bit feisty and impish. Daddy makes everything better, and says He
still loves us. Scooping us to each of His sides, He then tells us…
Now, show Daddy what you two started to do today, and this time, lets do
it properly, and Daddy might just let your little kitties cum…..babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-47981164160823178382014-05-18T13:32:00.000-07:002014-05-18T13:32:18.551-07:00The new girl on the 'shock'.*repost from Fetlife and old blog*<br />
<br />
Here at the Sanctuary in Denver, there are a couple of ladies who are
kind enough to set up an area where you can try a demo with the Violet
wand at times. A couple weeks ago, I got to experience this.. and a few
people have asked me to share this 'electrifying' experience.<br />
<br />
So at first, I admit... I sat there watching the lovely two ladies
that went before me.. and my nerves were just everywhere! And of course,
I know this is silly, but I have hardware in my entire back, so my
thoughts turned to, ack - what if it like shocks all of that?!?! I think
I suddenly started looking like a frightened puppy, and held on to my
Uncle Kambriel and Daddy ... thinking, ummm.. am I sure
about this?!<br />
<br />
They both of course, being two of the very few people I know who can
instantly calm my nerves, gave me reassurance. And, the lovely lady (I
do not know if she'd like to be named, so I will just refer to her as
the lovely lady in the corset ;)), was also very kind and reassuring.
She let me touch her arm, to get a starting feel to it.. and from that
point I was, all.. Oo, gimmie, please?! lol.<br />
To get past what was rest of my nerves, I respectfully asked my Daddy if he could please warm me up with a start of spanking
session. This helped, a ton.. for I got to start floating into mind
space before the wand play even started. Daddy and Uncle Kambriel gave
me some very yummy swats, and I was soon tingly and getting a little
floaty.<br />
<br />
I should mention here, that when Daddy and Uncle work
together doing whatever it is they are doing with me, they just like -
connect on a way cool level. There is an awesome connection between the
three of us, that make whatever scene/session or such have a wonderfully
nice, and intense in a good way feeling to it.<br />
<br />
So, anyway!<br />
<br />
Before I knew it, the lovely lady in the corset had moved over, and
it was my turn! She had her hand on my leg, and all I could think at
first is - behave, behave, behave and keep that leg still.. for, if you
have ever done or seen a scene with me, you'll know that I have a bad
habit of moving my legs a lot. (I'm working on that!) lol.<br />
<br />
Daddy started by doing some caresses, and the bits of sparks were just flying through me.. once in awhile I'd jump, being some
areas were more intense than others.<br />
<br />
It quickly, got so intense, that Uncle was holding my chest down,
and at some point, I remember him holding my neck up, for I guess I was
all over the place, and about to go flying off of the table! x_x<br />
<br />
I
didn't care for the feeling on my lip piercing.. I do remember that, but
as Daddy explored different parts of my body with it - I was
quickly gone into a very delicious subspace, and squirming.<br />
I also remember Uncle saying - "Did we put a towel underneath her?
.. then... "Should we?" And me, managing to say, or much like moan
"Yesssssss!" lol.<br />
<br />
I also remember yelling out - "Holy Shrek".. as things got more
intense... which had the lovely lady in the corset laughing and saying
that was a new one.. and I sort of remember Daddy explaining that I
am not allowed to swear, so I tend to get creative with my wording. x_x<br />
<br />
Somewhere during the session - I remember Daddy ordering me to
cum - (He has been training me in this area for about two years now) .. I
had no objections! And I do believe this is where things got to that,
ah crap, maybe we should have tied her down?? For I really was all over
the place! From there, I think I got ordered to do this a few times ,
and I do remember asking permission to cum at a couple points also.<br />
<br />
During one very yummy moment, Uncle, knowing just how sensitive
my nipples are, had grabbed both of my breasts, which had sent me even
higher into a very wicked all over body type orgasm.<br />
<br />
Now, a good friend asked me - what <em>did</em> it feel like?<br />
<br />
I've been trying to find words to describe it here for her.. for she is very anxious to try a session like this.<br />
<br />
At a low level, it feels like a prickly gentle tickle.. and I do not
honestly know how high of a level she ended up with on this - but when
going over my choke collar and such, there is way much more of a zap to
it. It doesn't <em>hurt</em> hurt, but there is that mix of yummy fear that you know <em>it</em> can very likely hurt if cranked up.<br />
<br />
The sensations seem to run deep into your body.. when the stimulation
was in areas like my thighs, breasts and so on.. it was a very deep
sensation.. and actually a very pleasurable one. I think most people
associate electricity with, yikes, this is going to hurt! So, that adds
to that excitement and fear of it all. If, you're like me, and get off
on that sort of thing.<br />
<br />
I'd still be a bit nervous to go .. head to head.. with this if it
were fully cranked up! But by the end of the session.. I was so floaty
and lost in subspace and my body was squirming and having those deeper
body orgasms, that they could have done just about anything to me,and I
likely would have kept on begging for more. :o<br />
<br />
In the end, I received very wonderful after care from my Daddy and Uncle.. they dressed me into my footie pjs, and my Uncle somehow
managed to get my very shaky and quivering body into the social room and
onto the couch, where I could just curl up on his chest as he held me
and soothed me.<br />
<br />
Daddy cleaned up as my Uncle delivered wonderful
after care, and I felt amazing.<br />
To everyone who was involved in the session..Daddy, Uncle Kambriel,
and the lovely lady in the corset... thank you all for a very, very
pleasurable first experience with the violet wand!babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-48327955280597808452014-05-18T13:22:00.000-07:002014-05-18T13:22:50.973-07:00Minty Fresh.So, one afternoon I was touching up my hair color (I always have new and fun colors going into my hair) - and discovered some new lessons learned.<br />
<br />
1) Mouth wash takes hair dye off of your skin really, really well.<br />
2) It does help, to have your Dom/me help get the back of the neck and so on, or places you cannot reach with said mouthwash.<br />
3) BUT, beware, that if your Dom, suddenly decides to be frisky, and
torture your already turned on self - and strips down your pants to
fondle,play and tease you ..... BEG them to wash their hands first...
for this is what happened..<br />
<br />
<br />
Him - Does said stripping off my jeans and such and bends me over the sink to fondle/caress and tease my girl bits.<br />
Me- Oo, mmm.. but, Dadddddy.... I am already going crazy...!<br />
Him - Gives me that look, that I know means to be quiet and take said torture....<br />
Me - Oo, dear.. it tingles.. ack.. and burns.. and ACK, your hands have mouth wash on them!!!!!<br />
Then...<br />
(Insert much laughter on his part... and much squirming on mine while
attempting to get said mouthwash off of my girl bits......) x_xbabygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-9304845521561898122014-03-13T15:45:00.000-07:002014-03-13T15:56:36.139-07:00Little Inner War. *Possible Triggers within post*<h4>
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9CyLv86Nxuk/UyIubn9Im3I/AAAAAAAAAOA/7u_9GsvWeeI/s1600/NikkiNice_Baby_Girl_by_FatBottomedGirl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9CyLv86Nxuk/UyIubn9Im3I/AAAAAAAAAOA/7u_9GsvWeeI/s1600/NikkiNice_Baby_Girl_by_FatBottomedGirl.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a><i><b>Before I start writing new posts, I want to share a few posts I wrote over at Fetlife while I was on my, very long blogging hiatus. The first one I would like to share, goes out to all of those who have a little/middle side. I think, in the time since I wrote this post, I've come a long way with it. I will also share the comments I received on it,for they were pretty enlightening. </b></i></h4>
<div class="content mls60 may_contain_youtubes">
<br />
<br />
I've been thinking about this topic since it happened
again, in such a bad way the other night. Between the time of bike ride
yesterday, and last night and today I have been trying to look inside of
myself with a clear head -and answer the ongoing question of why I have this inner war inside of me of pushing away my little side.<br />
<br />
It's a very conflicting feeling, knowing you not only want - but need
something, that you continue to push away against and fight.<br />
Is it to be defiant? Absolutely not. I am an imp in many ways, but defiant I usually am not.<br />
With that being said - I will rewind a touch. That moment of being
triggered, felt like a serious shut down inside of me. Like I was
starting to disconnect myself from it again. Why I think this is
happening, is the constant<br />
stress and worry around me... about my Father and being still numb over
my grandmothers death, being she was more like a mother to me than
anything.. and of course dealing with the never ending family drama that
everyone always<br />
insists on trying to put me in the middle of. Even my mother, subconciously (I think) still does this to me.<br />
<br />
<b>Wait</b> Moment of huge clarification just hit, in thinking about what I just wrote.. I almost deleted, and<br />
started over, but I think it's important, so I am leaving that - and continuing with the revelation that was just revealed here.<br />
I think while pondering all of this just now, I have had a huge eye
opener on why this incident was such an extreme one on my end.... The
sudden tears and refusing to put my binkie in my mouth.. then once in,
only keeping<br />
it there because I was told to do so. Then spitting out only moments
after you fell asleep. I had this urge to throw all my stuffies across
the room, and my binkie along with it.. but being all the stuffies that
get a place on our bed have a special meaning and place to me, I didn't
have the heart. So I lined them up neatly behind me, but for the first
time in a very, very long time.. I did not sleep with any of them. I
felt angry, and I couldn't stop crying. Which, I rarely cry up till this
last Saturday night after the release session, and the new approach that was taken on that. The tight squeezes during, opened a flood gate.<br />
<br />
The next morning, the feeling was no better. I pushed it away, like I
normally try to do. But I had this very strong urge, to pack everything
, and I mean everything, little related - and put them away in a box
-if not throw them in the dumpster. I only did not, because I knew I would be in
a world of trouble. And, matters were not helped, that via text, I kept
defying when being told to get my binkie, and put it in my mouth.<br />
<br />
I
honestly, only did briefly, and it was quickly back out as I went about my day, with my
guts turning and feeling very confused on my sudden, harsh reactions to
all the little stuff. I felt, shut down inside with it. Disconnected,
but angry and conflicted.<br />
Now, after typing all of this, and my new eye opener.. I am realizing
that it's not just the current very bad health state of my father that
triggered me. Mothers day, triggered me. While it was a wonderful day,
for special<br />
reasons - once home, I got a voice-mail from my mom. It had guilt, in
her passive way, all the way through the message. On, why have I not
called yet, or texted, and her rambling passive way of doing things. I
called her back, to explain I had not been home all day, but had a wonderful night
before and day - and that I was planning on calling her in the evening
once things were calmed down here for the night. I got her voice-mail,
my guts turned, and I tried to put on that chipper tone and wish her a Happy
Mothers day. She still has not called me back. So I know she has hurt
feelings.<br />
<br />
All my life, I have ran to take care of both my mother and father. At
7 even, searching to find my mothers whereabouts for many years when
they were unknown. Taking care of my father always, in cooking,
cleaning, ironing,<br />
filling out bills, taking care of myself - the house.... him. Dealing with what is, and always be, two men in one.<br />
One, a man with the sense of humor of someone like Chevy Chase, and
the charm and wit of someone like Burt Reynolds back in the day. And the
other, who had a violent, quick temper, and many issues.. and would
lock himself away from us and the world for weeks or longer when things got very bad.<br />
<br />
My Mother was here just recently also - so aside the voice-mail, we
already have touched base some on the fact that her visiting us here was
hard on me, being she took many trips down memory lane while we were
out about in town. I was born here, and they lived here 'till things got
so bad that she left. She showed me the houses we lived in, the first
two... were just houses. Nothing special about them, so I let her go on
her memory lane trip, and<br />
listened. The last, as soon as I saw the house... I could see everything
inside. The stairs, the furniture.. everything. Even the wallpaper. It
was very surreal, looking at the outside of a house that you did not
know you would remember, but you suddenly can see everything inside of
it, or how it was.<br />
She went on another trip down memory lane, this one being a bad one -
and while I have heard bits of the details here and there of the event
she was seeing in her own head, I suddenly could see it in my own. I was
sitting on<br />
the top of the stairs - looking through the iron bars of the stairwell.
They were screaming - so loud it was almost a numbing kind of loud. I
had a small blanket that I was chewing on, and watching them, unknown if
they<br />
even knew I was there, or cared. My Father had a gun to her head, and
everything was so intense, the look in both of them - faces, eyes - I
don't recall what was being yelled, just reactions, face expressions. I
tried to snap<br />
out of this quick, sudden visual I was having, as she continued to talk
about she left and kept driving - she didn't mean to keep going but she
did, and kept drinking along the way. She then went missing for the
first time<br />
in my life -(and most certainly, not the last) and was finally found way
up in the mountains, where she almost was at the point of killing
herself, and it was days later before she finally realized she needed to
call someone. Meanwhile, no one knew where she was, alive, dead - etc.
She was reliving that after horrors in her own head.<br />
I have, since she has been here, been fighting those triggers and
memories - along with all the very fresh, and present health issues with
my Fathers heart.. and this voice-mail that day, seemed to be a trigger
on top of others that just set me off here.<br />
I think, on a very deep, and personal level, during my crying, anger,
wtf moment there - is that the rejection was a regression. I was
repeating what I know.. or knew.. regressing to a point to where it
touched my subconscious... not rebelling, but regressing to what I knew
at that age, and even younger when on the stairs, watching the
screaming and gun.<br />
I know I have made a lot of progress with things in my past - these
actually being minor to a lot of other things that did happen.. but I
think what I have touched on here, is the way I handled things at
certain ages, and possibly regressing to them, rather the normal
regression ways of running to a stuffed animal or binkie. I didn't have a
lot of these things growing up, I had to grow up hard, fast and deal
with a lot of things that most would never guess I'd been through in my
life. While I want the things I missed, the stuffies and etc. I think I
am fighting them, because they have never been something that was in my
life for long. And one very key phrase that has stuck in my head today
has been this...<br />
<b>If I allow myself to be a kid all will fall apart, that is
what happened the first time so why should it be any different now? That
is what my psyche is screaming at me.</b> This is the key thing, that I need to work on... I think.</div>
<br />
<br />
<section id="comments">
<header>
<h1>
49 Comments </h1>
<h1>
*note - I have edited names to just *friend* to protect the privacy of those on my friends list. <br /> </h1>
</header>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5577896" id="post_comment_5577896">
<footer>Friend:<span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5577896"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:26:13 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:26:13 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:26PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
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<div class="content">
Thank you for sharing this. I want to hug you so bad right now<br />
<br />
Friend: </div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5577911" id="post_comment_5577911">
<div class="content">
I have much to say....but I've told you my past.-.so I think you
would get an idea of what I plan to say....I'm at work right now...but I
will be back to comment.<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5577954" id="post_comment_5577954">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5577954"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:35:18 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:35:18 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:35PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
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<div class="content">
@Friend Thank you, sweetheart... comments like that help a
lot, and make me glad I shared it here. And I would happily take that
hug the next time I get to see you! :)<br />
@Friend I knew you would... smile. Big hugs. xo</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578041" id="post_comment_5578041">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578041"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:48:50 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:48:50 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:48PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578041"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:48:50 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:48:50 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:48PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>Friend:
<div class="content">
That mom guilt on mother's day can be a real bitch. Perhaps it will help to know you're not the only one: <a href="http://youtu.be/i_5ML-OIk58" target="_blank">http://youtu.be/i_5ML-OIk58</a></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578046" id="post_comment_5578046">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578046"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:49:21 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:49:21 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:49PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578046"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 22:49:21 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 22:49:21 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 4:49PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>Friend:
<div class="content">
well wrote i know it must of been hard to write this and know your not alone hun.<br />
The last few sentences chime with me on a big level with my regression I
had to grow up fast and hard and thought if i didn't that everything at
home would fall apart. So know you have a extra set of ears if you need
them massive huggles xx<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578131" id="post_comment_5578131">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578131"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 23:08:02 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 23:08:02 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 5:08PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
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<div class="content">
@friend lol, thank you for the link and laugh.<br />
@friend The realization of the last was a huge thing today, I
think. You cannot continue to work on something, if you do not know the
reasons or cause. :) And thank you... very much! xoxo<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578241" id="post_comment_5578241">
<footer>
Friend:<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578241"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 23:31:24 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 23:31:24 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 5:31PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
Hugs,and no need to fight little feelings or things.I'm Just
realizing some of what I've always felt and letting it out some.seems to
calm me. Sorry for all u have been thru in ur childhood.count ur
blessings,u have brattamer and ur the world to him and let him help
u.hugs<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578303" id="post_comment_5578303">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578303"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 23:42:08 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 23:42:08 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 5:42PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@friend (smiles) Thank you sweetie - i have made peace with much
of my past, still a few skeletons to work on, but i've come a long way
for sure. This was more, an eye opener to why i keep fighting this, and
what still seems to trigger me here. All a growing progress, for sure. I
am glad to hear you are being able to explore this side of yourself,
that is wonderful. :))<br />
And yes, i am very thankful, i have many blessings, and much good in
my life - which is what makes me want to work hard to resolve things as
well.. i do have Tamer, and now also @sparks_cloud, and many many other
blessings and wonderfully awesome things in my life. :) Hugs! <3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578327" id="post_comment_5578327">
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<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578327"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 23:45:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 23:45:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 5:45PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
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</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578327"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/15 23:45:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/15 23:45:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 5:45PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> Friend: <br /><div class="content">
Holidays always can make u feel things.I usually figure it out past certain holidays.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578410" id="post_comment_5578410">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578410"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:01:51 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:01:51 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:01PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578410"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:01:51 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:01:51 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:01PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578410" id="post_comment_5578410">Daddy: <br /><div class="content">
I stick by what I said earlier, your parents could fuck up a wet dream!<br />
<br />
Friend: </div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578595" id="post_comment_5578595">
<div class="content">
<i>Hugs you very tight</i> :) I'm proud of you for writing
this, Tabs :D I hope you can remember that you have your Daddy and, as
long as he's with you, he'll keep you safe and make sure nothing falls
apart.<br />
and I hate it when parents play the guilt card, so <i>doublehugs</i></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578677" id="post_comment_5578677">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578677"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:44:04 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:44:04 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:44PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578677" id="post_comment_5578677">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
I really think you're on the right track. Rejecting your little
first happened WHEN you were little, and that hurt something inside you.
As an adult you're trying to fill a need that was denied... If that
need someday is fully satisfied you'll still enjoy being little because
of the fun and comfort you have adult memories of... although it's quite
possible the need to be little never IS completely satisfied.<br />
But rejecting all things little is as self-destructive now as it was
then. You aren't alone now though, and that's a very important
difference.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578686" id="post_comment_5578686">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578686"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:45:59 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:45:59 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:45PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend Thank you hon. (hugs) <3<br />
@Friend Doesn't surprise me one bit, we've had many things
in common since day one, and always have seemed to think so much alike. I
really, thank you, for sharing that here with me - and adding your
thoughts and experience in there.. I very much appreciate it. And my
inbox is always open to you as well. <3 (hugs tight going your way as
well) I am sorry you also, have had a rough path in the past, but know
you're an incredible person, and one person I think is to be admired.<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578687" id="post_comment_5578687">
<footer>
Friend:<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578687"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:45:59 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:45:59 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:45PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
That last paragraph, I think that is how I'm feeling too. :((</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578697" id="post_comment_5578697">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578697"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:48:00 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:48:00 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:48PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend Thank you so much, Uncle.. I was hoping to hear your
two cents on things. (smiles) And everything you said there, made very
much sense.. as always. I have many wonderful people in my life, for
that, I am so very happy and thankful for.. and you are very much one of
those people.<br />
@Friend (Hugs) :(</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578740" id="post_comment_5578740">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578740"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:56:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:56:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:56PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
Friend:<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578740"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 00:56:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 00:56:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 6:56PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
<i>hugs</i> I didn't say anything you didn't already know. ;)<br />
Now here's something you aren't ready for... you need to start
blaming your parents for what they did to you, and you need to hold them
accountable. You can't heal until you stop blaming yourself in your
heart for things you had no control of.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578790" id="post_comment_5578790">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578790"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:03:52 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:03:52 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:03PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend (Big hugs) Well, perhaps - but you always have a way of
wording things that always take it that extra needed step in my head
for me.<br />
It stings to read that, but I know you're right.. them, and a few
other people as well. Not sure how to even start with that one, but
having it pointed out helps, so I can recognize it, and figure out just
how to do that. :/</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578866" id="post_comment_5578866">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578866"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:14:22 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:14:22 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:14PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>Friend:<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578866"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:14:22 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:14:22 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:14PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
Don't stay quiet when they smack you on the nose with a guilt
trip. You're not a child anymore.... FIGHT BACK! If it makes them
uncomfortable, that's their problem... the truth hurts when you've
fucked someone over, and it's time you stopped giving them a free ride
for their bad behavior.<br />
Start with 'it really hurt me when you did that to me.' The ONLY
acceptable reply is 'I was wrong to do that to you and I'm sorry... is
there anything I could do to make it up to you?' Don't accept any other
answer. Counter their excuses with 'I was a child and needed your
protection, not your problems. As an adult I have my own protection and I
still don't need your problems.'</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5578975" id="post_comment_5578975">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578975"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:28:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:28:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:28PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>Friend:<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5578975"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:28:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:28:01 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:28PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
Honey, you know how i feel.<br />
Stay frosty and remember that certain people love you unconditionally.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579027" id="post_comment_5579027">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579027"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:38:31 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:38:31 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:38PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend ... I had to read that twice, only because it so rings
true. Daddy has been trying to help me do things like this over the
years here - some, I have gotten better with, but only with certain
people.. my Father? I don't know I ever will be able to do so. I have
such torn feelings about that man - from all the good and bad that
happened... I still end up looking at the point that he kept me, he
tried. In my heart, I know that all the other things that happened from
him, and the things he let happen, or even once found out happened,
didn't get handled in a way they should... I know in my adult, logical
mind here - that so so so much that happened was just wrong on so many
levels. Geez, obvious Daddy issues, huh? Oh wait, we knew that.
(snorts) lol<br />
Ok ok, seriously - I know you are very right, as you usually are,
Uncle.. and I know Daddy will very much agree with you. He's been trying
to pull me out of that - (make everyone happy, even if my happiness is
the cost) mode that I've been in since I was a child for years now. It's
time I make this progress, for many many reasons here.<br />
.. sigh. :/</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579045" id="post_comment_5579045">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579045"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:41:19 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:41:19 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:41PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@friend Thank you sweet pea. For more than your comment, and you know what all for.<br />
<br />
Friend: </div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579099" id="post_comment_5579099">
<div class="content">
Sweetheart, you can have all the people around you in the world
to help comfort your little. Only one person in the world can DEFEND
her. You're still letting her be hurt, and when she hurts more than you
can bear you try to make her go away. She'll NEVER feel safe that way.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579134" id="post_comment_5579134">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579134"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 01:55:12 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 01:55:12 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 7:55PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend :( I know you're right.. and the thought stirs up yet
more tears over it - god Im doing to much of this crying crap lately, so
unlike me. :/ How do I do that with him though? I am so scared of
having yet another death on my shoulders that I cannot move past because
of things that didn't get done, or said - or the tragic ways of losing
them - like my brothers death. They are only giving him some time at
this point.. and his death is going to be next - and even sooner still
if all this family drama crap doesn't get kept away from him and his
blood pressure keeps sky rocketing. :(</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579242" id="post_comment_5579242">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579242"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 02:11:43 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 02:11:43 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 8:11PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579242"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 02:11:43 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 02:11:43 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 8:11PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>Friend:
<div class="content">
By thinking of your responsibilities, in the order of how much
control you have. You have most control of yourself, and your little is
the part of yourself that needs your attention and protection.<br />
Next is your children, from youngest to oldest. They need you to be
as emotionally solid as you can be so they feel safe and sure of their
environment until they have the ability and wisdom to control their own
environment.<br />
Next is Tamer, who shares responibility for your children and THEN you.<br />
Now after those responsibilities are met, THEN you can see how much
control you really have over the actions of your brothers, parents,
whatever... and therefore how much responsibility for their lives or
their deaths.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579263" id="post_comment_5579263">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579263"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 02:14:51 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 02:14:51 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 8:14PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend Again, very well said Uncle. You have given me so much
food for thought and as always, the extra guidance I am needing.. thank
you, always..</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5579356" id="post_comment_5579356">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579356"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 02:33:38 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 02:33:38 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 8:33PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer><footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5579356"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 02:33:38 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 02:33:38 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 15, 2013 @ 8:33PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>Friend:
<div class="content">
You're very welcome, niece. If there's one lesson you could learn
from your parents it's this... when you have no control over yourself,
then the ones who depend on you will suffer. So keeping ourselves
emotionally healthy is our first and most important responsibility, and
one that no one else can fully accept no matter how much they wish they
could. (It's just impossible to MAKE people drama free.)</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5582330" id="post_comment_5582330">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5582330"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 15:07:02 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 15:07:02 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 9:07AM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend So, very very true. Thank you again for always being
there for me - and offering your wisdom and guidance. I know what to
work on, now, and I know what I need to change, and a lot of that change
in the end, will be good for me, all the way around, and not just my
little side. It all starts with realizations,hm? (big big hugs) xo</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5582413" id="post_comment_5582413">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5582413"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 15:24:20 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 15:24:20 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 9:24AM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5582413" id="post_comment_5582413">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
xo Yep it does. If you don't realize how you're setting yourself
up for frustration, anger, guilt... then you'll always fall for the
traps. <i>HUUUUGS</i></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585147" id="post_comment_5585147">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5585147"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 22:18:38 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 22:18:38 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 4:18PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585147" id="post_comment_5585147">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
HUGS. What you wrote hit home with me. Totally different
situation but my childhood was taken away & I'm still trying to
understand why I'm such a child now & why can't I grow up. Thank you
for sharing</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585249" id="post_comment_5585249">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5585249"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 22:33:12 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 22:33:12 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 4:33PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend I'm glad my sharing can help others.. (smiles) And
thank you for commenting to let me know that. My inbox is always open if
you ever want to talk or anything. xo <3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585354" id="post_comment_5585354">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5585354"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 22:52:13 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 22:52:13 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 4:52PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585354" id="post_comment_5585354">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
Yes but the brat in me kept singing in my head while I was trying
to type that last msg.... I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Toys R Us kid
they got a million toys at Toys R us that I can play with! lol.<br />
I'm here for ya too if you need to talk/vent <3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585400" id="post_comment_5585400">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5585400"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 23:01:01 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 23:01:01 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 5:01PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend lol! Nothing wrong with that, for sure!!! <3 And
thank you, pretty. And hey, I know I haven't gotten to your last inbox
message, I haven't forgotten, just have a lot going on in my head right
now and a bit behind on doing other things. <3 xo</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585637" id="post_comment_5585637">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5585637"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/16 23:51:14 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/16 23:51:14 +0000" title="Thursday, May 16, 2013 @ 5:51PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5585637" id="post_comment_5585637">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
No worries, hun. Get yourself sorted out. You can only do so much in one day <3<br />
<br />
Daddy: </div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5589603" id="post_comment_5589603">
<div class="content">
Reading all of the comments here shows how much support you have,
here and at home. And your Uncle seems to have a way of verbalizing
every thought that I have on this subject.<br />
You did a great job with this princess and it is a big step in the
healing process that will lead to a happier life with less doubt and
anxiety.<br />
I love you My princess!</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5589811" id="post_comment_5589811">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>:
<span class="smallest no_underline quiet">
<a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5589811">
<time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/17 16:31:48 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/17 16:31:48 +0000" title="Friday, May 17, 2013 @ 10:31AM">10 months ago</time> </a>
<span class="controls"> | <a class="delete_comment" href="https://fetlife.com/posts/1560628/comments/5589811">delete</a>
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Daddy Thank you, for coming back to this, and adding your
thoughts. It means a lot to me. I am very thankful for the support I do
have. @Friend has been a rock to me as an Uncle, and does have a very
great way at getting things put into words for me as I need to see them.
And you, have been my rock since i was 14 years old. i love You too,
Daddy. <3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5589829" id="post_comment_5589829">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5589829" id="post_comment_5589829">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
I wont go into it knee deep, instead I will just repeat, what them hippies said.<br />
make love not war<br />
and even if they were wrong on some accounts, on the personal level, especially when dealing with our inner selves<br />
make love, not war<br />
is the way to go</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5589850" id="post_comment_5589850">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5589850"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/17 16:38:15 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/17 16:38:15 +0000" title="Friday, May 17, 2013 @ 10:38AM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend As my Miss always seems to say, all you need is
love. lol. We're both Beatles fans, so that works for me! ;) Thank you
for commenting, Mr. ***.. always so enjoy hearing from you! <3<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5593633" id="post_comment_5593633">
Friend:
<div class="content">
Brat,<br />
I am sorry this took so long I have been dealing with so much! I move in
with Daddy in 2 weeks, I am seeking for another job, and I have 2 new
special people in my life…plus lots of other RL things. I have read this
posting over and over trying to figure out how I was going to word it,
well here it is.<br />
Firstly I love ya girl, and I am right here with you on this internal
little’s battle. I have been fighting my little side for almost 7
years. To this day, I still fight her a tad bit, but we are able to live
in the same body and be okay. I am still very conflicted on how I can
fight and push away something that is a part of me. Something I needed
to live.<br />
I find it ironic how much we really have in common. I to fight my
little side because I grew up without being able to be a child. The
whole coloring, binkies, and all that just wasn’t there. I grew up with
a mother whom abused me and molested me. I was a no body, I did not
have kid friends to play with, I did not get to play outside, or color. I
sat inside and cleaned, cooked and watched the kids. As I grew up I
started to hate myself and everything that “childhood” was supposed to
represent.<br />
Then I started to feel as though I was going crazy…having different
personas that I could not explain, but I could feel they were there.
That need to sit down and watch cartoons with a binky in and a stuffie
in my arms. I refused to do it though. I thought as a adult it was
stupid of me to do that which made me hate my little side. I wanted her
gone, I wanted to be an adult without a little voice in my head yelling
at me to sit and play with a toy. Every time some bought me something
that would make my little side happy I would throw it away. I used to
collect stuffed animals, I threw them all away.<br />
Then my alcoholic father who was abusive to me and would scream in my
face once he got a beer or two in him. He belittled me and made me feel
small and fragile. I HATE that feeling, and I used to think my little
side would be small and fragile therefore making me feel vulnerable. I
could not have that. I completely blocked her out, I hated her. I hated
how she made me feel and how she needed all those “little” things that I
resented.<br />
So let me tell you what happened because I disconnected myself from
her. I had this unhealing empty spot in my heart. Like a piece of my
soul was missing. I was depressed and I hated people. I hated
everything. I was more alone then I had ever been. I couldn’t play with
my siblings or be apart of anything “kid like” with them. I didn’t do
toys, coloring, tv. I hated laughter, and I hated people whom were
happy. I could not be happy. I started unhealthy habits and became so
depressed I thought about killing myself, more than once.<br />
I then found the lifestyle and saw they spoke about littles and all
that…I almost refrained from getting in the lifestyle just because of
that. But something in my head told me to go with it. So I did lots of
research to understand what the lifestyle was about and how I would fit
in. I went with a slave at first, because I grew up feeling like a
slave…I cooked, cleaned, serviced anyone, anyway I could and even a
smile was praise enough for me. Mind you all thru this I had no little. I
had disconnected from her. She had left me. So I found my first Master
when I was 19. I was with him 8 months (turned 20 with him). I thought
it was the best thing in the world. I felt like I had found my place. I
cooked, cleaned, showered him, pleased him in every and all ways that I
could. Then it went downhill….he no longer showed that he cared, he
longer did anything with me…I was a maid. I was taken for granted and
more problems just occurred. I had put myself back into another bad
spot. So I left him and came home. Then I found Daddy and this is where
everything changed.<br />
Daddy showed me that I was not living a good life, he built me up and
talked me through all my problems. The happier I got the more I started
to feel my little side returning for a second chance. Daddy bought me
color books, and requested me to color some pictures for him. I looked
at them and pushed them away. He pushed them back and said “Do it.” Me
being the submissive I am and wanting to please I started coloring. My
little came back slowly the more I colored. I started to feel better as
I colored. Then at home with my siblings I was sitting in the room with
cartoons on for my baby sister and I ended up peaking at it, feel in
love and started watchin the show daily. The more I watched cartoons,
and colored the more happiness I felt come back to me. I could feel my
little returning, and it was making me feel whole again. Now 4 months
later I would hurt you if you took my colors away. I would cry if I lost
my stuffies. I sleep with a binky because it helps me sleep and stay
calm. I finally have my little side back after 4 long months of having
to re have a childhood shown to me. I realized it is okay to be a
little, it is okay to want to sit and color and hold my stuffy by her
arm and carry her around.<br />
Now maybe you ask ok…where are you going with this. I say all this
because I learned the hard way about disconnecting from her. I had to
teach myself how to be a child again so that I can feel whole. I learned
that I cannot live without my little side. She is apart of me, and you
cannot get rid of who you are. You have to embrace her, and grow with
her and teach her and learn from her. You have to understand that it is
OKAY to be a little, it is okay to color and play and be goofy just
because you can. Put a binky in your mouth and do not remove it, get
used to it, embrace it. Color and play stuffed animal wrestling and all
other sorts of things….but do not push those things away…they are what
make you, you.<br />
I am always here to help you , if you feeling like you might push her
away…please come to me…I can help. I have been there. I hope this
helped.<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5598319" id="post_comment_5598319">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5598319"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/19 03:57:19 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/19 03:57:19 +0000" title="Saturday, May 18, 2013 @ 9:57PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
Friend - First - never apologize (smiles) Second - i love yas too!<br />
Now to the deeper stuff, I know it wasn't easy for you, to write all
this out here, where other people aside from you and I can read it. But,
in doing so, please pat yourself on the back and know I am proud of you
for being able to do it. I know how hard it was. This post was a huge
break through for me. I myself cannot even believe how far i have come
with things in just a matter of a few days, between these eye openers,
the support from everyone, and the approach my Daddy and Miss has been
taking with me since..I am finally getting where I have been fighting to
get for a very long time.<br />
I am not doubting, with my inner stubbornness that I will have
moments still, where I will try to fight it, I've struggled some already
the last few days with trying not to slip back into the fighting habit.
When I do, I will remember your advice here,along with the support from
everyone,and the key things to why I was fighting it so hard to begin
with. It's also been agreed between my Daddy, Miss and me, that it's
very effective when they are strict with me, when i start to fight using
certain things like my stuffies or binkie and such. That is helping me,
a lot.<br />
As for the past - I could go on and on, about how much I relate to so
much that you said there. Yes, it is a bit ironic how much we do have
in common in some areas. I try to tell myself, though - that with all
that I have seen, the abuse, Chris killing himself,the other deaths in
my life - it has all made me who I am today, and I see things in a way
that some do not. For that small thing, I am grateful for... for I see
the little things that get taken advantage of on a daily basis, I stay
grateful for the good things I do have, knowing it could be worse - and
HAS been much worse in my life.<br />
You're a wonderful gal, and have a lot of wisdom for your age
sweetie, and Im very happy we have become such good friends, and will
always be here for you also. Thank you for the open door of being there
for me always, the same always goes to you as well.<br />
Im proud of you for commenting on this, with such heart felt, and hard words.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5598448" id="post_comment_5598448">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5598448" id="post_comment_5598448">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
@Brat... this is so stunning Lady.. so brave.. what a beautiful
woman/child/little you are... and mother's? we all have them..and they
love to mess with us.. but we..are stronger, braver, tougher..than they
think.. and you are.. Gosh I love you DollFace...so much..</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5598511" id="post_comment_5598511">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5598511"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/19 04:48:47 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/19 04:48:47 +0000" title="Saturday, May 18, 2013 @ 10:48PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend (gets all mushy and runs over and pounce huggles ******!!) <3 Thank you, lovely lady.. so much, for commenting.. being
who you are.. and all the amazing things you do and say. I am so very
happy and blessed to have met you! And so very true on the mother thing,
lol! I love you too beautiful lady!!! <3<3<3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5599273" id="post_comment_5599273">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5599273" id="post_comment_5599273">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
sending you lots and lots of hugs- your uncle has said it right,
and i too need to do the same thing for once and for all...and yes,
guilt trips SUCK ASS!i still to this day deal with that</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625210" id="post_comment_5625210">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5625210"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/22 21:21:09 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/22 21:21:09 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 22, 2013 @ 3:21PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Friend Thank you sweetie - and yes, my Uncle is wise and always very helpful. (smiles) Hope all is well for you.</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625274" id="post_comment_5625274">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5625274"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/22 21:28:17 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/22 21:28:17 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 22, 2013 @ 3:28PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625274" id="post_comment_5625274">Friend/Uncle <br /><div class="content">
I feel like Mr. Owl in the tootsie pop commercial. :D</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625303" id="post_comment_5625303">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>:<span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5625303"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/22 21:33:06 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/22 21:33:06 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 22, 2013 @ 3:33PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Uncle (lol lol!) Or the wise owl in winnie the pooh!!<br />
<br /></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625313" id="post_comment_5625313">
<footer>
Friend/Uncle<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5625313"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/22 21:34:12 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/22 21:34:12 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 22, 2013 @ 3:34PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
<a href="http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=Jhjb4P_jnKk&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DJhjb4P_jnKk" target="_blank" title="http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=Jhjb4P_jnKk&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DJhjb4P_jnKk">http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=Jhjb4P_jnKk&desk…</a></div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5625327" id="post_comment_5625327">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>:
<span class="smallest no_underline quiet">
<a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5625327">
<time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/05/22 21:36:52 +0000
" datetime="2013/05/22 21:36:52 +0000" title="Wednesday, May 22, 2013 @ 3:36PM">10 months ago</time> </a>
<span class="controls"> | <a class="delete_comment" href="https://fetlife.com/posts/1560628/comments/5625327">delete</a>
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@Uncle lol! :D <3</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5832143" id="post_comment_5832143">
<footer>
<br /><span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5832143"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/06/20 22:38:36 +0000
" datetime="2013/06/20 22:38:36 +0000" title="Thursday, June 20, 2013 @ 4:38PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer> </article><article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5832143" id="post_comment_5832143">Friend: <br /><div class="content">
~all the hugs you can handle~</div>
</article>
<article class="comment clearfix controls-loaded" data-id="5832301" id="post_comment_5832301">
<footer>
<a class="avatar" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457"><img alt="brat_inna_box" class="profile_avatar avatar s60" height="60" src="https://flpics2.a.ssl.fastly.net/482/482457/0004e1e4-2bce-d2a2-fa1f-3c40bf6a519d_60.jpg" title="brat_inna_box" width="60" /></a>
<a class="nickname" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457">brat_inna_box</a>: <span class="smallest no_underline quiet"><a class="datetime_posted" href="https://fetlife.com/users/482457/posts/1560628#post_comment_5832301"><time class="refresh-timestamp initialized" data-timestamp="
2013/06/20 23:04:50 +0000
" datetime="2013/06/20 23:04:50 +0000" title="Thursday, June 20, 2013 @ 5:04PM"></time></a><span class="controls">
</span>
</span>
</footer>
<div class="content">
@friend <i>hugs</i> Thank you, boo. <3 I've made a lot of progress in this area - and really should do an update on this.<br />
<br />
<i>*Photo from Deviant Art by FatBottomedGirl* </i></div>
</article>
</section>babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-8813276596485705442014-03-12T11:22:00.000-07:002014-03-12T11:34:17.162-07:00Back and ready to dig in!I am back! <br />
<br />
As some of you know, I moved to a new domain, way over a year ago. That went well, but I missed the followers here. And I am delighted to see, that a lot of you are still here.<br />
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While I was away, my mentor passed away. With her, went all of my content, she was a huge loss in my life. I lost my grandmother near the same time. But, while away, I expanded, and grew as a submissive and a person. I have met wonderful new people. Have awesome new dynamics and relationships in my life, and I feel I am ready to dive back into the world of blogging. I figured some revamping is in order. Since joining our local community, my new name quickly became brat. And they now all prefer to me as the Dungeon brat. lol.<br />
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Much to share,always more room for growth.. and fun, naughty shares. I hope you all will continue to stay with me, and I hope to meet more of you as well. Please feel free to follow me, if you are not already doing so. I will be working hard to getting this place a new look and some fun posts. <br />
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I will also be bouncing around trying to catch up with all of you, and what you've all been busy writing as well! :)<br />
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xoxo brat *previously known as cricket/tabby) babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6278755592449390315.post-77068417961696825782011-03-06T19:45:00.000-08:002014-03-12T10:54:06.324-07:00Daddy holds my hand has now moved! IS BACK!My mentor died last year, and the new blog location, and the content is gone as well. I have taken some time, and am ready to come back. Please see the upcoming post that will follow this one, as get this place back up and running. For those of you have stayed as followers here, thank you!<br />
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Love,Kinks & Lollipops,<br />
baby girl tabby (aka cricket) (Now known as brat) babygirl crickethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08793412645387357918noreply@blogger.com6